FEATURES

Roids Ravage the Runway: Super Models Exposed as Clemens Affair Takes Unexpected Turn

by

Lloyd Featherstone

(Special to Sportsman’s Daily)

6’-7” Amazonian supermodels from Latvia…models with superhuman stamina, capable of withstanding 72 hour non-stop photo shoots…hair stylists and personal assistants pummeled in fits of rage…TSD’s investigative fashion writer, Lloyd Featherstone, files this head-turning account from New York in the aftermath of Fashion Week.

Slovenian model of indetermindate gender strikes pose before gathering a makeup artist, two publicists and Donatella Versace's assistant in a vice-like headlock. All four passed out and were revived by a contingent of male models who happed upon the scene.

NEW YORK (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) - Several weeks ago, Roger Clemens’ accuser Brian McNamee upped the ante by claiming he injected Debbie Clemens, the pitcher’s wife, with HGH before the couple posed for a 2003 Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition photo shoot. The ensuing “he said, he said” gave credence to persistent rumors of widespread HGH use among top super models (and not-so-top supermodels), all but overshadowing well-received collections from the likes of Michael Cors, Anna Sui and Vera Wang (loved the rubber bondage dress, honey, and the ivory goatskin coat made from free range highland goat is to die for).

It seemed just yesterday when the “waif” look ruled the runway and anorexic models wafted weightlessly across the pages of top fashion magazines.  Then, beginning around 2003-2004, I noticed changes, starting with the Marc Jacobs show in Milan, where his homage to 70’s teen fashion (with hints of playful pederasty) was in sharp contrast to the freakishly large, angry models that stalked the runway – at least a third were over 6’-4”, with comically oversized heads and shockingly large, mannish hands -- all exuding a barely suppressed rage that seemed completely at odds with the theme of the collection.

Flash forward five years to New York’s Fashion Week, where I caught up to several prominent “fashionistas” who shared their thoughts and observations about the rumors convulsing the fashion world.   

“I’m not surprised, I’ve been backstage, I see what goes on,” said veteran fashion watcher and serial dater of super models Derek Jeter. “Was I shocked to see some of the world’s most beautiful women with needles sticking out of their butts? Well, shock isn’t the word that comes immediately to mind. Though I’ll admit, the excitement tends to diminish when you get a load of the back acne.”

I asked Derek if he’d ever dated a model he suspected was “juicing.”

“Oh yeah, definitely. A couple of years ago I was dating a girl from Slovenia – 6’5” with legs like a steel vice. It was like having sex with Jason Giambi. Come to think of it, one morning I woke up with Giambi in my bed – to this day I’m not sure what he was doing there.” 

Over the past couple of years, the Giants’ Jeremy Shockey has gone upscale – no longer a regular at the city’s most exclusive strip clubs, Shockey has become a fixture at fashion shows – and on at least two occasions has accompanied me to Paris and London during the off-season for private showings. 

“A couple of years ago I was in Milan for several shows…I don’t remember if it was the Donna Karan or Versace show, but after I went backstage to hit on some models and out comes Naomi Campbell, screaming, throwing cell phones, kicking and swinging like a wild animal. I ain’t seen nothing like it – think Ray Lewis, but with amazing bone structure. I’m a big guy, I like contact, so I’m thinking, damn, this broad’s hot…until she punched me in the nuts, which wasn’t cool. Now either that’s one crazy be-yatch, or she’s juicing – most likely both.”

Of the super models he’s dated, Shockey estimates “easily two-thirds” were taking HGH.  

“Other than the occasional freak-outs, which I learned to deal with (mostly by leaving the apartment for three weeks and changing my phone number), the sex was great. The thing about HGH is that it aids recovery –  no matter how much punishment you dish out, ten minutes later she’s fully recovered and ready to go.”

The fashion world is, by definition, fickle. Yesterday it was “heroin chic,” today it’s HGH and super-sized super models. So let’s not get our panties all in a bunch – this too will pass. And to tell you the truth, aesthetically I much prefer today’s uber-model look – and frankly, some designers show better on big, strapping, androgynous frames.  As far as the scary and increasingly frequent hissy fits, heck, it comes with the territory. If there’s a major downside, it’s the dramatic spike in bulimia – HGH allows you to withstand sustained purging, but with no accompanying loss in muscle tone – which might account for how streamlined some baseball players look in their double knits…and how good Ms. Clemens (and Roger, for that matter) looked in the SI photo shoot (though you don’t to put your loafers in the way of a fashion model during her pre-show “warm-up”). Beauty has its price. Seeing that big fat bully Roger Clemens jailed for perjury? Priceless. (Andy Pettitte asked me to say that.)

 
MORE FEATURES

Ask Andre

The Sportsman's Daily is proud to add a new feature, Ask Andre with Andre Morrelenbaum, the award-winning journalist and Jockstraps Radio correspondent. If you want to ask Andre, ask here.

Mike Tyson: "The Whole Thing’s a Sham. I’m Actually a Shakespearian Actor"

Ex-Champ Talks with Sportsman’s Daily

Gisele Bundchen Backtracks on Promise to Run Naked Through Manhattan if the Pats Lose

“If Anyone Needs to See Me Naked Right Now, it’s Tom”

Larry Bynon, 49 Year Old Inventor of Paper Football Loses Eye in Freak Field Goal Mishap

Bynon, regarded as the father of Paper Football suffered a devastating injury while demonstrating the game he created to a group of fourth graders in Blairstown, New Jersey.

Learning to Love NASCAR…or Die Trying

A Special Sportsman’s Daily Report: Dan Milch files from inside the Checker Auto Parts 500 – literally inside, as he rode shotgun with NASCAR veteran Ricky Rudd. 

Lock Down

Ric "Word" Testaverde

The Sportsman's Daily sideline reporter Ric “Word” Testaverde, Federal Inmate 18230-1113

Tubs

with Clutch Parker

Clutch sinks in and towels off with football great Terry Bradshaw

Time Capsule Feature

Killebrew Feasted on Fastballs, Then Feasted on Woodland Creatures

The Next Best Thing

The Sportsman's Daily Talks with Whiffle Ball Legend Biff Wallace About New “Gyroball” Pitch Expected to Wreak Havoc on MLB

Hard-Nosed Agent Drew Rosenhaus Looks For a Hug, Gets a Huggie Instead
 
HOME | BREAKING SPORTS | BREAKING BALLS | FEATURES | THE SCRUM | JOCKSTRAPS RADIO | FAQ | NEWS ARCHIVE | CONTACT US
Content intended for readers 18 and over.
©2006 The Sportsman's Daily, a divison of The Sportsman's Daily WorldWide, LLC. All material is copyrighted by The Sportsman's Daily WorldWide.
All rights reserved. Unauthorized use of material without the permisson of The Sportsman's Daily Wordwide is strictly prohibited.